3 posts tagged “gratitude”
After the last post, I did want to try to focus a bit on the positives of my own situation. While I am still hurt by my husbands' decision to divorce, I do recognize his love for the children and despite his statements to others, I have never had any intention of trying to keep him way from them in an attempt to hurt him. My children are wonderful, sensitive, caring, smart, funny, gentle, loving, and extremely social. They are equally bonded to j and I, and we have both worked as a team for the past 9 years to make sure that this is the case. We have always taken incredible pains to make well-informed decisions on everything from education to car seats to discipline, and I'm terrified of sharing those decisions with anyone else but him.
My greatest wish for my children would be to have them lose nothing in this process. I know that j wishes the same, and has been trying so hard to shelter them from the reality of separate households, holidays, changed bedtime routines, and to be a stable presence in their lives throughout this whole mess, even when I was extremely unstable. That they are just now beginning to comprehend the changes being implemented is heartrending, yet they had a nice session tonight with the counselor (the boys each saw her for about 15 minutes, and our daughter saw her for 45 minutes after my own session). The boys talked a bit about their feelings about the separation, but they both also talked about their friends and the pictures they had drawn while waiting for their turn with Dr. K. ;)
Tonight my daughter spearheaded a major clean-up effort in our basement. She did this without ever being asked and without my ever having even mentioned the basement at all, since I'm currently using it as a staging area to collect j's belongings until he needs or wants them. I'm also not nearly as focused on perfection as I once was, though it has been wonderful to have the kids back into a routine and the house is staying basically the way it was before this year. Each of them have been really complimentary about how clean the house is now that they put away backpacks, shoes, coats, dishes, snack wrappers, and laundry consistently instead of waiting for it to all collect to alert-levels. It really doesn't take them much effort, and it makes for so much less complaining when it is time to straighten up before bed or get ready for school in the mornings.
Tonight we read one of my favorite books together at bedtime, Curious George Goes to the Hospital. I got to tell Kadin about when he was a tiny baby and he had to drink barium and get an x-ray, just like George! Carson had fallen asleep on his own in the living room from sheer exhaustion (he didn't have a nap today because of our busy schedule), and so I simply carried him up after we read our story together, and snuggled him in with the big boys. I'm so thankful my kids have each other. That they treat each other with so much kindness and care, and it feels so nice when they hug me and tell me how much they love me and that they miss me when I'm not with them. Maybe they don't just see me as the laundry-witch after all.
What a nice morning! =)
Everyone woke up happily, had tons of sugary cereal with milk, put away their bowls and spoons and cleaned up the table. There were no missing footwear crises. Backpacks were easily found, homework in the proper place and absolutely no voices were raised or tears shed. Lots of singing ensued on the drive to school. I'm amazed at how my boys seem to have inherited daddy's lyric-memorization skills, and their singing isn't bad, either.
I'm back home finishing up my "homework" for my counseling appointment this afternoon, and Peyton has her second appointment today right after mine. I'm thinking we may try to have the boys talk to Dr. K for a few minutes if time allows, since they will be with us, too.
Dinner plans include delicious roast beef, noodles and gravy, and the infamous Pillsbury® crescent rolls. Yum! It really is nice to sit down at dinner with the kids like this. As a family we generally ate outside of the house about 80% of the time, so we really were almost always together, but my kids still seem to think my cooking (which was a rarity to be sure!) is a special treat. I wonder how long that will last, lol! ;) Last night we had friends over, which meant there wasn't even an empty seat for me to dwell on, and not even a crumb of leftover meatloaf of mashed potatoes!
Okay, I'm totally procrastinating with that whole homework thing, but I think this post counts as extra credit.
- Cuddling with my little boy and watching him climb, slide, eat ice cream, and dance to Wubzy cartoons
- Enjoying preparing a meal that always makes the kids cheer
- Jeans fresh from the dryer
- My contacts finally arriving
- Oreo Cookies 'n' Cream Milkshakes
- Looking forward to dinner on Friday night at one of my favorite restaurants
- Chubby babies who never fail to smile when they hear my voice :)
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